Bittersweet
by buddieswithbilis
Summary: Jack is on a mission that turns slightly manic but one that could've turned out a lot worse ...and of course the good guy always gets the girl ...sorry other guy!


**a/n **Anything alluding to Torchwood or Doctor Who is completely intentional … The breaching of any copyright law, however, is not! RTD : thank you for allowing Jack to live on through TW and please do not think bad of me for, on occasions, yearning for just a little more Janto!

This is my first posting and for some strange reason, known only to my mental instability, I have decided to go angsty….not my favourite theme so to compensate the next story is complete drivelly (is that a word?) stupid nonsense. But, hey, we all need a little bit of stupid now and then …right? ( please agree with me before I completely lose the plot ! )

In the meantime this little two- parter is a story of Jack Harkness on a mission…. One that veers towards the slightly manic but which could have turned out to be a lot worse!

Hope you all enjoy ….. it does lighten up in Part Two!

BITTERSWEET

Part One Manic Monday

It was only ever going to be a matter of time. How much time? Irrelevant. The intent would never waiver, his determination would never wane and so after fifty long irrelevant years of searching, finally, here he was.

The swirling red luminescence shrouding the sphere hypnotised as it drew closer and closer. His features hardened with anger and hatred

The silence of the control deck was broken as fingers stabbing down onto buttons brought forth a decreasing of turbine whine and hydraulic hissing. Even before the craft had stilled into a vacuous stasis he was arming himself, double checking for weapon and filter. Reaching down he snapped up the cylindrical explosive device and running a finger lovingly along its length glared down at the planet below. His reverie broke and he tappped at the manipulator. A swirling gold haze enveloped him and with a whisper of

"At last! " he vanished.

His eyes burned and immediately streamed with both tears and blood. Clamping his lips together as he tried desperately not to breathe he armed the canister and dropped it to the surface. As his lungs began to scream with pain he took himself back to the ship.

Choking on the acrid stench invading his senses he began retching up blood and melting flesh from his lungs. He shook uncontrollably as the searing pain became unbearable. Blood began to run back from his mouth and nose into his throat, the lining melting and raw. Gasping out through sobs and screams he reached for his gun. Pressing the barrel firmly to his temple he stilled and with a whisper of

"For you, my love" he pulled the trigger.

This was a quirk. It wasn't fate. It wasn't destiny. This was his penance, his punishment. This was his coping mechanism. He gasped back to life and reached out for comforting arms that never came.

Reorientation?…..realization?…desperation?…determination!...He began again.

Ignoring the drying tissue and blood stains he reached for his weapon and another canister, this time pre arming it. A quick change of co-ordinates and he was gone.

The stench filled his head. The burning once again threatened to relieve him of his senses. This time he was quicker…..but not quick enough. The scream rang out around the control room and blood and mucus were sent at projectile pace towards the floor. With delirium taking control he dredged his mind, what is it? Who was it? The memory burned forth. Through choking sobs the gun was raised…

"For you, my love" and he ended his pain once more.

A gasp for breath…the mind distressed…..cannot let go…..let go of what?...

This was his curse…this wasn't fair…..his coming back….nobody there…not fair….not fucking fair.

He takes control…..he won't stop now

"You can do this!"

The rage turns into pain…then the rage is back again….

So much anger….. deranged with grief…." You can do this! "…there's self belief….

Emotions schooled, he primed the canister and considered for one brief moment the vacu-suit hanging in the corner…..it could save him from the pain and torture …and the inevitable death. He tapped and vanished returning in seconds, eyes raw, lungs raw ,tears real ,screams surreal…the pledge…the shot… the death.

The screams and shots blurred in to one….no stopping 'til a thousand done.

Three hundred days…eight hundred deaths…two hundred still to go.

Habitual…obsessive….compulsive…..repulsive…..still hurting and still so quite alone.

So, on it goes and on and on not stopping 'til the job is done

Nine hundred days…..a thousand deaths…..his mind screams for relief. Forgetting pain; an engine whines the distance is increased.

"Okay!" …

Target needs setting… wavelength needs setting….the frequency found…..the digits dance round….

The breath is held

4 LOCK …5 LOCK…6 LOCK

"For Ianto" he whispers…the signal is sent.

A thousand lights flash bright and burn

A halo rings the fading red

The sphere implodes, none left to mourn

A planet gone, a species dead.

He watches, waits ; prepared for storm….the warning of danger and turbulence comes.

The ship shudders. The field holds , the immediate threat of danger has gone.

A calm overrides him. His dementia clearing and allowing him to process his actions he sits quietly. What has he done? He glances around at the blood and guts dried and putrifying with a stench even he was struggling to stomach. Then he's laughing. He doesn't do laughing anymore …. but he's laughing

"Not so simple clean -up operation !"

and the chuckle continues….then fades to a smile…..which becomes a sigh…then there's the sobbing….head in hands sobbing…no feeling of guilt….no remorse for millions of deaths…just pain…the same soul tearing pain….still there. Fifty years and eight hundred days of waiting for a release that isn't there. Why does he still feel so bereft?

He still hasn't got him ….He wants him…..he needs to hold him again. See his sappy smile again and hear that ridiculously loud Welsh laugh again…..he …just…..wants….him.

He wipes his eyes

"Fuck it…I've had enough of this….I do not deserve to live this shit life" His fingers quickly glide over the buttons as they flash excitedly across the console

"I am not"…. stabs at a button

"Putting up with" …punches down onto another

"This crap"….. and another

"ANY LONGER !"

He pauses, momentarily reflecting on the repercussions of his actions in the past. This_? This would be the most irresponsible thing he would ever do. Creating a paradox ? Oh, really? Risking the future _of untold numbers of Human beings? Come on! ...Seriously? Surely his love for one man was not worth such a sacrifice?

In a heartbeat he set the ships co-ordinates for Earth….Wales….Cardiff….2006 and hit CONFIRM.

Spinning In his chair he surveyed his domain

Right!...now where the hell do I start with this lot?"

TW TW TW TW TW TW TW TW

Part Two Double Trouble

A/N Ok angst over, this is the inevitable Jack wants ….. so Jack gets! scenario. God bless him and all that sail up him!

Promising himself never ever to become so disturbingly deranged again Jack smiled proudly at the spick and span-ness of his control deck. Spinning, he checked on his whereabouts…..yep, blue and vaguely polluted …he was home again.

Confirming that the date was correct he suspended the ship out of radar on the far side of the moon tapped twice and in a mist of gold was gone.

The tourist centre was a mess, definitely the right time line then! Tapping at another button he sent the hub below into a temporary stasis. He knew that this morning there was only himself down there casually watching for any kind of talent on the cctv. Placing a carefully prepared note of where to find a half converted cyberwoman on to the counter so that it could easily be seen he depressed the button to release the outside door.

Nervous? Yep! Shitting himself? Most definitely! He edged towards the door and eased it open slightly to peek outside.

"Fuck!" there was nobody there…. He wasn't normally wrong with his timing. Looking down to check his wriststrap he shrugged but looked up immediately as movement outside caught his attention. He hesitated and for some strange reason not even know to himself he closed his eyes.

"Just look!" he berated himself with a whisper

"Stop being an idiot and Just look!" He pulled the door open a little more and slowly let his eyes open. The gasp was so loud he was surprised it wasn't heard. Trying to ignore the Judoon stampeding around in his stomach he pulled the door fully open and strode out on to the concourse in true 'yes, I know I'm fucking marvellous' Harkness style.

Ianto was there. He felt tears begin to well

'Don't start crying, don't you dare start fucking crying!'

He schooled his features and swallowed hard. Ianto, his Ianto still alive and so beautiful and so unbelievably beautifully alive '_get a grip, you idiot_!' He walked towards him. He'd forgotten how damned hot he'd looked on those first two meetings.

"Morning! ….. Coffee?" The mug was held out.

Bypassing the urge to just ignore the coffee and crush him into an embrace he took the mug and swallowed a mouthful.

"Wow!" Handing the mug back he began speaking before the young Welshman could get a word out

"So, Jones Ianto Jones do you wanna come work with me?"

Jones Ianto Jones stared blankly at him.

"Cat got your tongue there?" he smiled

"I er, um, er "

"Guess so! Let me help you out…..Ianto Jones born 19th August 1983 ..previously Torchwood One came back to Cardiff after the fall of Canary Wharf…hardly any family contact and your girlfriend died in the battle also you have tampered with all of your personnel files but we'll deal with that later. So, do you wanna come work for me?"

"fiancée"

"Excuse me?"

"She was my fiancee ….. Sir"

"Fine, so you no longer have any close family that you see on a regular basis and you no longer have a fiancée ….offer still stands!"

"Are you always so callous and unfeeling with you prospective employees, Sir?"

"Why are you here Jones?"

"Because I want to work for you "

"Wow, that was hard work!"

"Might at this very moment be having second thoughts though!"

This, of course, was not true. His main priority was saving his aforementioned fiancée who, in his eyes, was far from dead.

"Hey, I'm not such a bad person! All the reports about me are untrue!"

"Not from where I'm standing they're not ,Sir!"

"Ianto, if you insist on calling me Sir once more I shall be forced to lock you up with that Weevil you helped catch last night!, understood?"

"Undertood, S…understood"

Suddenly feeling as if his nerves were making him act out of character in the most irrational way he turned and began to walk off along the quay. 'Nice work, Jack! Maybe went a bit over the top there!'

"So, have I got the job or not?" the desperate Welsh voice carried along behind him. Raising a hand to beckon him to catch up he continued to walk along the decking. Ianto trotted up beside him and tried to keep up with the frenetic pace he was setting.

"Just out of curiosity, where are we going?"

"Just 'round the corner here ….. we need a bit more privacy"

"ok, now getting a bit worried!"

"Don't panic!" he smiled dragging him to one side around the corner of a hoarding "You're safe ….for the moment!"

He looked around. Hardly anybody else about at this time of the morning.

"Ok, firstly, let me apologise for acting like a complete jerk back there I hope I haven't put you off!"

Ianto shrugged his shoulders he would remain noncommittal for now.

"Before you start at the hub proper I need you for a special mission!" he tried to sound enticing.

"Where to?" ok, maybe he was a little intrigued now.

Jack looked skyward

"Up there …. You know…stars planets that sort of thing!"

"For how long, exactly?" ' _shit! was he sounding disinterested and ungrateful_?' the only thing crossing his mind at this precise time was how long his fiancée was going to be stuck on her own in the flat for.

"Exactly? Don't know…but as time is relevant it doesn't really matter….we'll be back before you know it!"

"Ok, so, when do we need to go?"

"Now"

"Now?

"Uh huh!"

"Oh!" he looked down at his clothing, he wasn't exactly dressed for space exploration.

"Don't worry you'll be fine!" Jack told him and holding out a bottle of water smiled

"Here, drink some of this, we're going to transport up to a ship"

"This is a joke, right?" This must be how Torchwood Three personnel amused themselves. At the expense of Torchwood One employees….ex employees!

"Deadly serious" he was told "Now, drink this we don't want you dehydrating!"

He unscrewed the cap and brought the bottle up to his lips…..what if it was poisoned? He lowered the bottle down again.

"It's just water!" the smile was disarming, something the young man hadn't anticipated. As the bottle was once again brought up to his mouth Jack watched him out of the corner of his eye. Satisfied that he was drinking he brought his wrist up and tapped at a button releasing the hub from it's stasis.

"Right, ok to go?"

Ianto shrugged his shoulders but flinched as Jack reached out to grasp at his arm.

"S'ok" he reassured him and placing the young mans' hand upon his forearm he depressed the relevant buttons.

As the nausea struck and the dizziness began Jack reassured him

"This'll feel a bit weird at first…but it is so worth it!"

Back around the corner Captain Jack Harkness flew out of the tourist office looking wildly around for the reason that he had just lost fifteen minutes of his life and why all of the cctv cameras had gone down. Without noticing the glow from further along the pier he strode back into the office contemplating his next mission ….. this being the execution of a half converted cyberwoman found strangely enough at the address of the former Torchwood One employee he had had the immense pleasure of meeting the previous evening. On checking over the current cctv recordings he found the teaser that his future self had left for him. Why on earth would he have been transporting with this Jones boy? And since when did he have a vortex manipulator that actually worked? He erased the footage before anyone else could see it …and he would never see Jones Ianto Jones again.

When said Jones boy awoke he would have no recollection of the past two days…no recollection of Torchwood One or of Lisa Hallet and Captain Jack would remind him of their wonderful relationship and how they explored the stars and new worlds together.

His life was now complete

Captain Jack Harkness was a traveller of time. He had his faithful companion and never again would he make life changing senseless mistakes…and it was for this reason that as soon as his companion woke up he was going to tell him over and over and over and over….. .

Fin. X

Ok….so…..taking a young innocent man away from the family and life that he knows

Is he a selfish bastard?

Or do we forgive him because he did it out of love?

Hope you enjoyed this! Bwb x


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